Friday, September 20, 2013

God Created Dean Martin In His Own Image, Then Stood Back

Hey pallies, likes dudes as part of ilovedinomartin's mini-celebration of the huge huge success of Nick Tosches' magnificant masterpiece of  his Dino-bio, "DINO: Living High In The Dirty Business Of Living," published 20 years 'go and still sweetly sellin' each and every Dino-day, we have chosen to 'gin reprint Tosches' mini-masterpiece, "God Created Dean Martin In His Own Image, Then Stood Back."

Scribed long before Tosches crafted this best sellin' Dino-read, it was printed as chapter 27 of The Nick Tosches Reader.   To view this likes clicks on the tag of this Dino-message to goes there.

As you might image, this brief  Dino-article is so so much like the Dino-bio... only in mini-form. The Dino-subject of this Dino-essay? The release of our Dino's much anticipated al-b-um Once In A While after a six year stretch of no new Dino-music from our great man.

Every word that Mr. Tosches speaks of our Dino is so so full of the sits back and enjoys the creative charm of Nick Tosches celebratin' a new Dino-al-b-um for true Dinoholics everywhere.

Likes, ilovedinomartin first shared this with all you dudes almost four years 'go now, and we have reprinted it once or twice each Dino-year 'cause is is so so rich in Dino-adulation.  So, likes whether you have often indulged in these wondrous words of Dino-devotion, or this is your first time to encounter such Dino-perfection, sits back and enjoys the transformin' power of Dino via Nick Tosches!   Dino-always, ever, and only, DMP

God Created Dean Martin
in His Own Image,
Then Stood Back

from the "Nick Tosches' Reader" chapter 27

Since 1972 life has been amiss, and there has been emptiness. Bare, unbudding; the saplings of stark need knew no spring. Candles were lit, letters were writ; prayers said, tears shed. But grayness begat naught but bleak grayness, and the new Dean Martin album never came.

Some of us, such as Elvis, who had declared Dino his idol, could not bear the agony of forbearance. Others, such as myself, endured by listening to the original mono version of "That's Amore" and reminding ourselves that it had taken Michelangelo eight years to fresco the altar wall of the Sistine Chapel --- and Michelangelo didn't even drink!

Now we faithful can rejoice. Let there be the pouring of liquors and the raising of skirts. The man has returned, and life as we knew it may resume.

It is no secret that Dean Martin has influenced more singers than any man alive. He taught Elvis the dramaturgy of sincerity, Jerry Lee the powers of diplopic decrescendo. Jim Morrison the nuances of erotic detachment, and Randy Newman how to comb his hair. Once In A While, Dino's first album in more than six years, proves that il padrone (as Jim Morrison called him) is still the master.

The love song has been the center of Dino's art from the beginning (He first hit the charts in 1950, vowing "I Will Always Love You.") Here the gurglings and gropings of love are celebrated in all their glory. "Without a Word of Warning" and "The Day You Came Along" tell of answered dreams of the moist kind. "It's Magic" and "Only Forever," two beauties from the '40's, bow the knee of fealty to She-Whose-Face-Launches-Ships-and-Smiles-Salaciously-After-the-Fourth-Drink, "If I Had You" and
"Once in a While" wallow sweetly in the lappings of unrequited love. "I Cried for You" is a savoring of vengeance. In "Love Thy Neighbor" Dino advices us to bless the skin of errant wives in no certain terms.

Two of the album's most impressive performances are found in "Twilight on the Trail" and a version of the World War I killer "That Old Gang Of Mine." The first, remindful of Dino's "Houston," is a homage to irresponsibility and the joys of immediate gratification. "That Old Gang of Mine" shows that while Dino is always singing about broads, his old buddies are still where his heart is.

What a guy.

Felice ritorno, Dino! Let's make it a regular thing again, okay?


Danny G. said...

Awesome read pallie!!!

dino martin peters said...

Hey pallie, likes Danny-o this Dino-prose is likes the mostest of the smooth, as satisfyin' as some of our most beloved Dino's fav liquid libations. Tosches' knows how to communicate the Dino-cool better then anyone else. Keeps lovin' our most beloved Dino!