Welcome back, mi amici. Welcome to Fall 2020! Well...it's official, pals...Summer is gone & it's time to be movin' on. Now, I don't mean relocatin' or nothin' like that, pallies. I mean it's time to kick Autumn into FULL gear here! Let go of the hot & sweaty days of sun bakin'...trade em' in for crisp & chilly nights & weekend leave rakin'! Haha!! It's not as bad as it sounds, pallies! Let's bang the sand outta our ears & get some cool cool Fall-type croons uh'-croonin'! Ha! These are GREAT GREAT times for throwin' in the ol' ipod headphones...gettin' outdoors...& spendin' some quality time...with Dino! Haha!! Yes, my friends...DINO! Who else is the BEST companion for cleanin' up yards & packin' up the patio?! He relaxes my soul & cleanses my brain. Turns work into fun & chores into play. I'll show youse what I mean, pals. Let's find a nice, easy tune to get youse started. Somethin' from the "Pretty Baby" al b um. How's 'bout a little "Only Forever"? Yes...this is a perfect Serenade for today. A TOTALLY chilled-out croon to EASE us into the new season. Just soak it in, my friends. Inhale it...hold it....ahhhhhh. See what I'm sayin', mi amici? So So calmin'. OK, pallies...let's get outside & get to work! Oops...I mean play! Haha!! Enjoy!
Sunday, September 27, 2020
Sunday, September 20, 2020
Danny G's Sunday Serenade with Dino: "Let Me Know"
Welcome back, mi amici! And welcome to the LAST Sunday Serenade with Dino of Summer 2020, as well! Man o man...where do the months go, pals?! Years, for that matter! Cant even believe I've had the privelage of doin' these FUN FUN Sunday Serenades for 9 WON DER FUL years now! Yup...Fall of 2011 was my first. TRULY can't express how much I enjoy writin' my deep deep thoughts 'bout life... through the eyes of a Dino-holic. Haha!! And at the same time...spreadin' the Dino-message! VERY humb'ly...I THANK youse for your weekly interest in my insanity & I THANK our fearless leader, DMP, for offerin' me the job. One which I take very seriously...but...in the funnest of ways, my friends! Now, pallies o' mine...let's get to this week's Serenade! Seein' how it's the last week of the summery season...I figured I transition us...gently...into the new one. Somethin' REAL mellow & O so soothin'! Well, pals...thinks I got just what Dr. Dino ordered! It's calm...it's tranquil...it's...well...IT"S PURE DINO!!! Haha!! Pulled it from my own personal "Go to" place for ULTIMATE chillin'! Dean's 1966 al b um, "Relaxin". "Let Me Know" will DEF I NATE LY... gently...glide youse into these comin' cool, crisp days ahead. Sit back & close your eyes, pallies. Dino's at the wheel & he's on cruise control, Hahaha!!! Let's embrace Autumn & see what Dean has in store for us next! It's gonna be a GREAT Fall, pals...just hit PLAY & relax. Enjoy.
Sunday, September 13, 2020
Danny G's Sunday Serenade with Dino: "Marina"
Haha!!
Man o man, am I in a mood today!
Don't know why, pals!
Just is!
Hey...that's good 'nough reason for me!
Haha!!
We gotta make the BEST outta EVERY DAY, mi amici!
Even the lousy ones.
Even in these CRAZY days!
When life hands us lemons...the hell with the lemonade, mi amici...squeeze them into a little vodka on the rocks...& throw on some Dino!
Haha!!
Yes, mam!
Now THAT'S the start of a COOL COOL day! Hahaha!!!
Wow!
What's got into me today?!
All's I did was sit down here & get ready to put this week's Serenade together...& BAM!
This CRAZY mood just came rushin' through me, my friends!
My heart started racin'...my body started vibratin'...& my fingers started typin'!
It's like the spirit of Dean just jumped in me & took control!
Hey, pallies...that's OK with me!
Dino take the wheel!
Haha!!
OK OK...let me catch my breath.
Let me regains my composure.
Let me chill-ax, a wee bit!
If I don't get this Serenade goin'...I thinks I'm gonna pop!
I gots an idea!
Think I'll have a little fun with this silly mood I'm feelin'!
I'm gonna let Dean pick this one, pals!
Yea, youse heard right!
Gonna put my trust in Dino's big meaty hands...& let him tell me what tune to spin!
He will know exactly what we need!
Gonna just close my eyes & see what jam I clicks on.
Ready???!!!
OK, pallies...round & round it goes...where Dino will stop...nobody knows....& POW!!!
Did it!
Oh man o man...PERFECTO!
"Marina"!
GREAT tune, my friends!
Fun Fun song with a Cool Cool groove!
I knew Dean would pick a winner!
Well, pals o mine...I'm hopin' this swingin' Dino-pick will stick with youse all week long... & help with ANY lemons that may have rolled your way.
The power of Dean's magic is un-endin'!
Ciao!
Sunday, September 06, 2020
Danny G's Sunday Serenade with Dino: You Were Made For Love"

Welcome back, my friends
How's September treatin' youse so far?
Not so bad...here, in my part of the world.
Was a BEA U TI FUL Blue-sky'd 75 degrees yesterday!
Summer just HATES to go, I guess!
I don't mind so much though, mi amici.
Fall is a GREAT season too!
I just LOVE the spooky vibe in the air from now 'til Halloween!
Truth be told...I loves September!
The weather is still comfy & a break from the heat isn't so bad either.
Hey...now that I thinks 'bout it, pals... I actually can't wait for the Autumn solstice...that means Fall in British.
Haha!!
'Nother cool cool occasion is comin' soon as well.
This week is the birthday of a VERY special someone to Danny G...who just so happens to be a GIGANTIC Dino-holic!
Hey!
That gives me a SWINGIN' idea, pallies!
I is gonna send this week's Serenade out to this someone & let her know just how SPECIAL she is! Seems that gettin' further & further from her younger years has got her stressin'.
Hey...tell me 'bout it, mi amici!
Haha!!
Anyway...She DEF I NATE LY has NUTHIN' to worry 'bout, though pals.
She's a GREAT GREAT lady & STILL has ALL the fellas howlin' at the moon!
Hahaha!!!
Thinks she just needs a little Dino-croonin' to lift her spirits.
Now let me see...hmmmm.
Got it.
A touch of Dean's "You Were Made For Love", should get her smilin'!
DEF I NATE LY get's me in a happy mood, pallies!
So, this one's for you...birthday girl!
Enjoy your day & enjoy the Dino-jam... goin' out just for you!
Ciao bella!
Tuesday, September 01, 2020
On This Day In DIno-history: September 1, 1949

Hey pallies, likes this very Dino-day , September 1 in the year of our Dino 1949, the weddin' bells did chime for our most beloved Dino and his queen of beauty bride Miss Jeanne Biegger. Dino and Miss Jeanne, wife numero duo, tied the knot at the pad of Mr. Herman Hover. This date likes 'gain holds the deepest of deep significance since Miss Jeanne passed away on August 24, 2016 joinin' our Dino forever in the here after.
As we, with reverence, remember this day of absolute awesome bountiful bliss for our Dino, ilovedinomartin shares with you a post that a Deanager tagged Catie shared at her tumblr blog, "They always look better at night..," on this day of Dino-significance, last in 2012. Our Catie combines an outstandin' weddin' pix of the beau-ti-ful couple with some potently powerful prose scribed by Mr. Jerry Lewis from his magnificant Dino-bio, "Dean and Me: A Love Story."
Just likes we totally totally grooves to be likes readin' these kind of greatly glorious Dino-details....and these remarkable reflections from Mr. Lewis notin' the extremely close relationship that our most beloved Dino had with his bestest of best pallie Jerry. ilovedinomartin sez our thanks to Miss Catie for creatin' this Dino-memory on her tumblr account, sure to bring many of today's nouveau hipsters to the keen knowledge and awesome adulation of our most most beloved Dino
We Remain,
Yours In Dino,
Dino Martin Peters

You just got out of a marriage,” I said. “What the fuck are you rushing into another one for?”
He just stared at me, shocked that I had hit the issues on the button. I hurried to explain myself. “Forgive me, Paul.” I said. “Jeanne’s a great girl, and I think she would follow you to the ends of the earth. I know she would wait until you were ready. And there are four kids to think about.”
Dean thought for a moment. “Listen Jer,” he said. “You know me better than anyone, so what I say is between us. I do worry about my kids. But this feels so right. So strong.”
I nodded, finally understanding that he was really in love, and probably for the first time. “It’s your life, pal,” I told him. “And you have to do what’s best for you. You’ve always taken care of your kids; now it’s your turn to take care of yourself. Everything’ll fall into place.”
He threw his arms around me in a bear hug and whispered into my ear: “Thanks, Jer.”
As it turned out, Jeanne was the best thing that ever happened to Dean.
Monday, August 31, 2020
DEAN MARTIN – Mr. Nice Guy.

Today we are once 'gain totally totally thrilled to share more Dino-adulation of the international source as we hear from historian Alan Royle at his powerful pad, "Historical Move Info, Movie Trivia, Fascinating Hollywood Facts."
Mr. Royle hails from Fremantle, Western Australia where he was born and has now returned to upon his retirement. Alan has swankly scribed a noteworthy number of valiant volumes and if you click on the tag of this Dino-gram and then click on the tab "My Books" you came view them. Let it be sweetly stated that Royle's credentials are top shelf!
Likes today we deeply delighted to share Alan's supreme salute to our one and only Dino, "DEAN MARTIN – Mr. Nice Guy." As all youse Dino-philes will see below, it is an incredible intro to our Dino with potent pixs and perfectly powerful prose. Royle hits many of the Dino-highs includin' his partnership with Mr. Jerry Lewis; a nod to our Dino's boypallie, his beloved Dino Martin, Jr.; his friendships with Mr. Frank Sinatra and Miss Marilyn Monroe; our Dino's fame and fortune on both t he big and small screen.
We shout out our absolute appreciato to Mr. Alan Royle for helpin' his remarkable readership
be drawn to growin' deeper and deeper in our most most most beloved Dino.
We Remain,
Yours In Dino,
Dino Martin Peters
btw, we're wonderin' how many of youse Dino-holics can point out the one error that Royle has made in his salute to the Matt Helm flicks?!?!?!?
DEAN MARTIN – Mr. Nice Guy.



Sunday, August 30, 2020
Danny G's Sunday Serenade with Dino: Once In A While"

Well hey there, pallies
Looks like the smolderin' Summer heat is lettin' up!
August is windin' down...& dare I say it...Fall is slowly creepin' on in.
Now, tell me pals...what's a TRUE, TRUE Dino-holic s'posed to do...with what's left of a Cool Cool Summer?!
Well...what else, mi amici?!
Keep the Dino-ball rollin' with nother' hot & sultry SWOON by the One & ONLY King of CROON! Haha!!
That's what!
Haha!!
Or...is it the King of Cool?
Oh Well...either way pals...this week's Serenade, "Once In A While", is nother' one of those great, great Summertime tunes...that REALLY heats thins' up & at the same time is sure to calm & relax your very soul!
I just am So So sure...that it set the mood on many a moonlit, balmy night, in good ol' Stu'ville...for many young lovers!
Hahaha!!!
I can picture a young...suave...Dino Crocetti serenadin' some lucky young chicalina with this very tune!
Now listen pals...Dean ain't askin' for much here. Just a quick thought every now & then.
I guess, pals...we all would like to think...that a once special someone thinks 'bout us...every now & then.
Maybe pals...just maybe...there's someone out there that you haven't seen in a while...and maybe...just maybe...THAT somebody might be worth a quick thought...as well.
At least...once in a while.
Enjoy!
Saturday, August 29, 2020
Tomorrow In Dino-history: August 30, 1969

Hey pallies, likes we loves! loves! loves! to find new sources of devotion to our Dino, and we loves even more to learn more 'n more details of our Dino's life, times, and teachin's includin' more historic dates in Dino-history. Likes today we gets to do both of 'em at one Dino-time. From the new-to-ilovedinomartin blog for Desert Radio Az KDAZ-db located in Hereford, AZ comes the noteworthy news that it was 51 years 'go on this date, August 30, in the year of our Dino 1969 that our great great man's great great al-b-um "Gentle On My Mind" went pure gold!
Gentle on My Mind was produced by Jimmy Bowen and arranged by Ernie Freeman, and released in November 1968 on the Reprise label.
Likes the track listin' included 10---count 'em---10 delightful Dino-croons includin':
"Not Enough Indians"
"That Old Time Feelin'"
"Honey"
"Welcome to My Heart"
"By the Time I Get to Phoenix"
"Gentle on My Mind"
"That's When I See the Blues (In Your Pretty Brown Eyes)"
"Rainbows Are Back in Style"
"Drowning in My Tears"
"April Again"
We shares with all youse Dino-holics the front cover coolest of cool Dino-pose as well as our Dino' havin' the bestest of best times croonin' this tune live on the Dino-show. We thanks all the pallies at Desert Radio Az KDAZ-db for puttin' us on to this important date in Dino-history and addin' to our Dino-edification. Likes to checks this out in it's original form, simply clicks on the tag of this here Dino-report.
We Remain,
Yours In Dino,
Dino Martin Peters

In 1969 Dean Martin's album "Gentle On My Mind" is certified gold.
Thursday, August 27, 2020
“Let me deal to him,“ Dean says.....


Today we fantastically feature extremely excitin' excerpts from Tom's powerfully potent prose that, of course, awesomely accent his father Leo's encounters with our most most beloved Dino. We are totally totally thrilled to fabulously feast on Tom sharin' of a noteworthy number of his daddy-o's first person experiences with our King of Cool...at the Copa where Dino and Jerry were makin' funnyand at our Dino's playground 'Vegas baby 'Vegas...both in a coffee shop and at a casino's blackjack table.
We here at ilovedinomartin lives to be able to impart such beautiful bits of Dino-lore to Dino-philes who gather 'round our little Dino-waterin' hole day by day and today's Dino-devotion is some stunnin'ly stellar Dino-remembrances that bring the biggest of big Dino-buddha grins to our faces, and so so much deep deep Dino-happiness as well. We can't thank Mr. Tom Junod and all the pallies at GQ for these remarkable reflections on our Dino's encounters with Junod's father. To checks this out in it's original source, likes simple clicks on the tag of this Dino-message.
We Remain,
Yours In Dino,
Dino Martin Peters
My Father's Fashion Tips
As we celebrate fifty years of GQ, we look back at some of the greatest writing the magazine has published. In 1996, in a piece that was nominated for a National Magazine Award, Tom Junod wrote not only of his dad’s impeccable style but also of the secrets—and underwear rules—of a lost generation.
BY TOM JUNOD
June 7, 2007
As far as I know, my father never made a dime from his voice—but to put himself across. And when he went to see Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis one night at the Copa and Dino passed the microphone around to patrons and asked them to sing a verse, my father was prepared: He took the microphone in hand and sang to such effect that Dean Martin had to take it back. “Hey,“ Dino said, his voice whittled down to a point of low warning. “Hey,“ he said, glaring at my father over his shoulder, with a squint, with a glance of sudden, alarmed appraisal, sparked by his knowledge that there was now another man in the room, and to this man attention must be paid.
“ 1957: My father goes to Vegas for the first time, in the year before my birth. He rents a convertible and drives across the Arizona desert with the top down, and by the time he gets there he is, well, black, and of course, and vibrant with the pulse of the elements themselves. He goes to a coffee shop, and Dean is there, and Dean recognizes him—a nod. And then the next day, my father goes down to the casino, to play at the blackjack table, and Dean walks over, tan like my father, but not of course as tan as my father, and asks the dealer to step aside. “Let me deal to him,“ Dean says (or maybe, preferably, “Let me deal to him“), and for the next twenty minutes that’s what he does—Dean Martin deals cards to Lou Junod. It’s just the two of them, two men wearing suits and shirts with French cuffs at twelve o’clock noon, in the middle of the freaking desert, and somewhere along the line it must occur to them—well, at the very least, it occurs to my dad—that they are men who very easily could have lived each other’s lives…which is why my father always told me never to ask for autographs (“They should be asking for your autograph“)
Wednesday, August 26, 2020
Dino "was a colossus in Las Vegas."

Likes back in the year of our Dino 1992, Mr. Marcus supremely scribed an absolutely awesome rad review of Mr. Nick Tosches' bold bio of our King of Cool, "DINO" Living High In The Dirty Business Of Dreams." Likes the review was tagged "DAYS BETWEEN STATIONS: ‘DINO’ (1992) and 'bout two years 'go it got reprinted in the blog "GreilMarcus.net," that showcases "some of the archived writings of critic Greil Marcus, pulled from as many sources as possible (magazines, newspapers, liner notes, books, fanzines, websites, podcasts, etc.) and posted in a more or less random fashion. This blog was created by Scott Woods with Greil Marcus’s knowledge and assistance."
Greil wonderfully weaves quotations from Tosches' tome with his own intense insights. Likes pallies it's profound prose that is worthy of any Dino-phile's absolute total attention, so dudes prepare yourself to be awed yet once 'gain by our mighty marvelous majestic DINO! We energetically extends our total thanks to Mr. Scott Woods who awesomely administers "GreilMarcus.net" and, of course, to premier proser Mr. Marcus himself. To checks this out in it's original source, likes clicks on the tag of this Dino-gram.
We Remain,
Yours In Dino,
Dino Martin Peters

DAYS BETWEEN STATIONS: ‘DINO’ (1992)
The partnership dissolved in loathing in 1956, but by then Martin was in place. He scaled the charts: the catchy “Memories Are Made of This,” number one in 1955; the entrancing “Return to Me” in 1958, a moment of soul music; the lugubrious “Everybody Loves Somebody,” which knocked the Beatles out of the top spot in 1964. He made more than fifty movies, from sixteen flicks with Lewis to such serious pictures as Edward Dmytryk’s The Young Lions in 1958 (Martin’s character got to kill Marlon Brando’s: “All I ever killed in my other movies,” he said, “was time”) and Howard Hawks’s Rio Bravo in 1959, to the Matt Helm thrillers in the ’60s. He was a constant presence on television. Despite often not bothering to finish his songs onstage, he was a colossus in Las Vegas.
That was how it seemed. “No idler works harder,” film critic David Thomson writes, “no drunk retains such timing.” Nearly every one of Martin’s movie co-workers whom Tosches spoke to said the same thing: he knew his own lines and everyone else’s. Nevertheless, what Martin communicated, in the moments for which he is most immediately and indelibly remembered, on record, on film, and onstage, was ease, effortlessness, repose—and something more, or something less. What he really communicated, as even in the midst of “Return to Me” a cloud of cynicism seems to rise from the preternatural smoothness of his phrasing, was that he didn’t care—and it is this that must be at the source of his appeal in his own time, and of his fascination today. “Dean, of course, had no use for any of this shit,” Tosches says, about something else, but as he retrieves Martin from his own silence—Martin has, Tosches notes, given one substantial interview in his entire career, to Oriana Fallaci—the line serves anywhere. It can finish a quote from Martin’s second wife, Jeanne Martin (“Dean doesn’t have an overwhelming desire to be loved. He doesn’t give a damn. He doesn’t get involved with people because he really isn’t interested in them”), or frame a comment on works and days, in this case the early ’50s:[Dean] did not know the new and improved from the old and well-worn. Homer, Sorel-II the Mystic: it was all the same shit to him. The Trojan War, World War II, the Cold War, what the fuck did he care? His hernia was bigger than history itself. He cared as much about Korea as Korea cared about his fucking hernia. He walked through his own world. And that world was as much a part of what commanded those audiences as the catharsis of the absurd slapstick; and it would continue to command, long after that catharsis, like a forgotten mystery rite, had lost all meaning and power… Ajax was no longer a Homeric hero: he was the Comedy Hour‘s sponsor’s foaming cleanser, no longer a contender with Odysseus for the arms of Achilles, but a consort of Fab, which had itself transplanted Melville’s musings on “The Whiteness of the Whale” with the dictum “Whiter Whites without Bleaching.”
More than anyone, Lewis ought to know. It’s a commonplace that Buddy Love, Lewis’s cosmic lounge-lizard alter ego in The Nutty Professor, his best film, is a version of Martin—but so, I think, is Lewis’s Jerry Langford in Martin Scorsese’s The King of Comedy, the most complete, all-exits-barred American horror movie since Psycho. With that dead Jerry Langford face, erased of all emotion save the wish to kill, this time Lewis played his old partner not on the surface, but from the inside out.Tuesday, August 25, 2020
Returning to the “voyeur song” by Dean Martin, whom my mother adored.......

Hey pallies, likes today we have yet 'nother delectable Dino-mention to share all 'cause our pallies at google Dino-'lerts keeps us here at ilovedinomartin up-to-Dino-date! Today we stop by the online presence of the bodacious blog "VillageSoup • Knox County Maine" where contributor Dr. Ralph Doc Wallace in his prose "Words and culture" speaks his piece on the issue of political correctness and just so happens to awesomely accent our darin' Dino in the process. Likes as you read 'long it won't take youse long to realize that Dr. Wallace is obviously no fan of PC.
Likes Wallace's prose begin lettin' his readership know that recently he found himself "humming along with Dean Martin singing “Standing on the Corner” and how he was "thinkin’ – wow, this tune is probably way outside the politically correct acceptance of today’s cultural police." Just to know how much pleasure this Doc was havin' hummin' while our Dino was croonin' give us such Dino-pleasure as well. And, likes it that was not 'nough Dino-delight, a bit later Dr. Wallace coolly confinds that his mother "adored" our most beloved Dino.
Musta be that mother Wallace passed her Dino-adoration on to her son and once 'gain we are profoundly please to know the incredible importance of one generation passin' on their Dino-devotion to the next...indeed that is wonderful way that will help each new generation to be beautifully brought into the Dino-fold.
We sez our thank you very much to Dr. Ralph Doc Wallace for openly and affirmatively liftin' up our Dino in his wise words shared in the "VillageSoup." To checks this out in it's original source and to read all of Dr. Wallace's thought provokin' reflections, once 'gain, simply clicks on the tag of this Dino-gram. And, we just couldn't resist sharin' a youtube vid of our Dino and other members of the Rat Pack croonin' the tune, "Standing On The Corner."
We Remain,
Yours In Dino,
Dino Martin Peters
VillageSoup • Knox County Maine
Ralph Doc Wallace
Words and culture
By Doc Wallace | Aug 29, 2019
Driving down Route 1 recently and listening to golden oldies on the radio, I found myself humming along with Dean Martin singing “Standing on the Corner” – a 1950s pop song originated by the Canadian group The Four Lads. The lyrics go, “Standing on the corner watching all the girls go by. Brother, you can't go to jail for what you’re thinkin’ …” Suddenly, I caught myself thinkin’ – wow, this tune is probably way outside the politically correct acceptance of today’s cultural police. Just as Frank Loesser’s Christmas classic, “Baby, It’s Cold Outside,” written in 1944, is now excoriated by the PC warriors as invoking rape, I am sure that old Dino would be chastised for extolling voyeurism.
.....Returning to the “voyeur song” by Dean Martin, whom my mother adored.......
Monday, August 24, 2020
Dean Martin, the most likeable of performers, gets to play Dino, the evil twin version of his persona.

Likes, while Mr. Gould has nothin' negative to say 'bout our Dino, taggin' our main man as "the most likeable of performers," he is clearly not a fan of this Dino-flick, and makes this completely clear in his prose. We gotta 'fess up that while we ain't in agreement with his sentiments are KMS, we do understand why he has the perspective that he does. Likes truthfully we are chosen to share Rick's remarks is not so much for his prose, but mucho more so 'cause of the powerfully potent pixs he has assembled to coolly compliment his written words.
The first image of the party on the set of KMS, is new to us, and we never ever tire of seein' 'n sharin' the other Dino-images included, 'specially the one of our Dino and Miss Farr in the shower.
We thanks Mr. Rick Gould for his candid comments on "Kiss Me Stupid" and for the swank selection of Dino-poses he has included in his work. To checks this out in it's original source, likes simply clicks on the tag of these Dino-thoughts.
We remain,
Yours in Dino,
Dino Martin Peters
Billy Wilder’s 'Kiss Me Stupid': Sizzling Satire or Stale Sitcom?
*Spoilers ahead—Only needed if you’ve never seen any episode of Three’s Company!

After Peter Sellers left due to multiple heart attacks, filming of 'Kiss Me, Stupid' was a cakewalk for Billy Wilder. Visiting the set are 'Some Like It Hot' stars Tony Curtis and Jack Lemmon.
Billy Wilder is one of my favorite filmmakers, who has directed some of my all-time favorite movies: Sunset Boulevard, Sabrina, Some Like It Hot, and The Apartment. Wilder’s adult, smart, uncompromising, yet witty storytelling paved the way for modern moviemakers. Imagine my surprise when I finally watched the director-screenwriter’s sex comedy Kiss Me, Stupid, starring Dean Martin, Kim Novak, and Ray Walston.
Kiss Me, Stupid was a notorious 1964 flop that in retrospect was the kiss-off to Billy Wilder’s career as Hollywood’s hottest comedic director. Like Hitchcock’s Marnie that same year, or Joseph Mankiewicz’ Cleopatra the year prior, or George Stevens’ The Greatest Story Ever Told in ‘65, Billy Wilder joined this elite club with Kiss Me, Stupid. They were all long-time, big-name directors whose stellar reputations were never the same because of one film.

Dean Martin as 'Dino' and Cliff Osmond as Barney, gas jockey & songwriter!
After a string of hits, right up through Some Like It Hot, The Apartment, and Irma LaDouce, Wilder was renowned for sexy comedies with stinging social satire, wit, and intelligence. These qualities vanished with his next project, Kiss Me, Stupid. The premise is about Orville Spooner and Barney—two would-be songwriters struggling in Climax, Nevada—everybody and every place in this movie have a cartoon name. When Dino, a lecherous and drunken crooner played by—surprise!—Dean Martin, is stranded en route from Vegas, the dim duo envision stardom.

Ray Walston, Dean Martin, and Kim Novak on a three-way love seat.
Dino doesn’t want to hear their pitch, and complains of needing “action” every day—to prevent headaches. Pervy Barney prevails on Orville to pimp his wife, Zelda, out in exchange for the crooner’s pop music consideration. Did I mention Orville is so jealous of his wife, he comes off like a comedic Othello? Married man Orville balks, so Barney prevails on a local cocktail waitress/hooker, Polly the Pistol, to pose as Orville’s wife and do the dirty deed. After provoking a fight with the little woman to get her out of the house—on their anniversary—the wife decides to celebrate solo at The Belly Button, the sleazy bar where Polly plies her trade. The married man, with the floozy’s help, wines and dines the crooner. All goes awry when the jealous Orville gets possessive over the spurious spouse and kicks Dino out. The hubby and the whore spend the night together in mock marital bliss.

The songwriter hubby and the "wife"/whore enjoy some faux-marital bliss.
The crooner ends up at The Belly Button, where Zelda has been drowning her sorrows. The wife is now passed out in Polly’s trailer next door. Guess who pays her a visit, thinking she’s the local whore? Dino listens to Zelda’s pillow talk, praising her hubby’s tunes. She in turn puts out for the crooner. Zelda passes on Dino’s payment to Polly, so she can move on, post-Climax. Orville and Zelda are reunited, Dino sings his song, and Spooner’s jealousy is finally over. Zelda gets the last word, the movie’s title. Everyone say awww.

And the real wife gets to play whore for a night with celebrity customer Dino!
Awww as in awful, that is. Typically, I go light on film plot recaps, but it’s one of this movie’s major flaws. The storyline of Kiss Me, Stupid is so one-dimensionally sleazy that it’s like 126 minutes of Playboy cartoons strung together. Billy Wilder frequently walked the tightrope of taste with risqué plot points in The Seven Year Itch, Some Like It Hot, and The Apartment. What elevated these classics were smart dialogue, empathetic characters, and appealing performances by their stars. Kiss Me, Stupid has none of these qualities. What’s really amazing for a Wilder movie is there’s not a single memorable line of dialogue, just a string of low-brow one-liners.

Dino as a most disruptive dinner guest. Kim as the "wife" doesn't seem to mind.
I will give Billy Wilder this: the opening and closing scenes of Kiss Me, Stupid show off his storytelling style admirably. And Wilder and his long-time screenwriter, I.A.L. Diamond, tell the story with great clarity—everything is nimbly wrapped up by Stupid’s final scene. Too bad the story and dialogue in between are so low-brow. There are stretches in Kiss Me, Stupid that are endless, the worst is when Orville and his “wife” are entertaining Dino.

Felicia Farr as the patient wife, Ray Walston as the insanely jealous husband.
This film was blasted by critics, censors, and the Catholic Church when it was released during the Christmas holidays, 1964. After the plot described above, is it any wonder? The Hollywood era was near the end of compromising with censors. Still, during the first half of the ‘60s, mainstream movies came on as provocative, but often ended up pussy-footing around. Wilder deserves credit for not being a tease, I suppose. While the targets of the director’s derision are admirable—moral hypocrisy, greed, and celebrity worship—the humor is about on par with a crass celebrity roast. The intelligent wit of Wilder is woefully lacking. The other big liability is the stars of Stupid. Wilder always worked with stars of great comedic flair and charisma—Shirley MacLaine, Audrey Hepburn, Walter Matthau, etc. In a film that desperately needs Wilder favorites Jack Lemmon and Marilyn Monroe as the jealous married man and the hooker with the heart of gold, we get Ray Walston and Kim Novak. Walston as Orville Spooner is grating, performed by a one-note Hollywood ham who fared better as a sitcom Martian. At 50, Walston was neither attractive nor appealing enough to believably attract gorgeous Felicia Farr or Kim Novak. But hey, we still have sitcoms starring homely comedians and their hot wives! Jack Lemmon was not available for this lemon, so Peter Sellers was originally cast as Orville, but suffered a series of heart attacks and dropped out.

Kim Novak as Polly the Pistol, who works at bar called
The Belly Button, in a town named Climax. Hilarious, right?
Marilyn Monroe was the original choice for Polly the Pistol, but famously expired before pre-production. So Kim Novak made her first film in two years as Polly. In her heyday, Novak was routinely panned as the most plastic kind of studio-manufactured star. In recent years, some film historians/writers now see nuances in Novak’s performances. To me, Kim certainly possessed vulnerability, which, when cast in complementary roles like Vertigo, was very effective. Yet Kim Novak’s limited range and lack of genuine charisma only makes me appreciate how Marilyn Monroe made sexy comedies seem effortless. Novak’s New Jersey accent makes her unfunny punch lines seem even flatter. And who thought it would be hilarious to have Novak play Polly as suffering from a stuffed up head cold? Kim sounds like a female Tony Curtis here.

Director Billy Wilder and star Dean Martin were a mutual admiration society.
Dean Martin, the most likeable of performers, gets to play Dino, the evil twin version of his persona. Martin’s brutal self-parody seems more foolhardy than brave, and only solidified his increasingly rancid Rat Pack image. Billy Wilder raved about Dean Martin’s untapped talent…but cast him as a dirty joke version of himself?
The great supporting cast is wasted as sitcom stereotypes. The worst is Cliff Osmond as Barney, the songwriting pal who concocts the whole sleazy scheme. Osmond is not just over the top, but totally repellent, looking and acting like Charles Laughton in slobbering villain mode. Osmond and Walston, as the untalented songwriters, are so frenetically unfunny together that I kept wishing somebody would magically give them the Bugs Bunny cartoon-style hook.

Felicia Farr is a lone bright spot as the sexy, sensible wife in 'Kiss Me, Stupid.'
The sole saving grace of Kiss Me, Stupid is Felicia Farr as Zelda Spooner, the Orville’s wife. Farr is lovely, sexy, smart, fun, and real—everything this film is not. The charming actress must have decided that starring as Jack Lemmon’s wife in real life was better than appearing in movies like this, because she acted only occasionally thereafter.
There’s a wave of current day film theory that defends Wilder as breaking barriers with his unvarnished, tough take on middle-class morals in Kiss Me, Stupid. Unfortunately, Billy Wilder presented the material in such a puerile, obvious manner that it comes across as trying to have your cake and eat it, too. And over 50 years later, Kiss Me, Stupid is still one stale slice of comedy.

We don't blame you for hiding, Felicia!
Posted by Rick Gould at 2:46 PM
Sunday, August 23, 2020
Danny G's Sunday Serenade with Dino: "They Didn't Believe Me"

Hey pals!
It's Sunday!
Now...that can mean only ONE thin'!
Uno!
Yup...time to do some Sunday Serenadin' with our BESTEST pallie, Dino!
Ain't nothin' wrong with that, mi amici!
After all...what's a BEA U TI FUL summery day without some FUN FUN summery Dino-jams?!
Just average, I thinks.
Gotta make it FUN, pals!
Man...it's gonna be September soon!
Crazy how the days go by.
Hey...guess what?!
No problem!
We're still partyin' with our pallie!
Summer ain't over yet, my friends!
We gots PLENTY of HOT HOT days ahead!
Simply add a little Dino-croonin' to the mix...& thins' will keep on SIZZLIN'!
Anyways, mi amici...gonna play a tune that...as I've mentioned here before...has never been recorded on a record by our pal.
At least not to my small amount of knowledge.
Haha!!
Not to fear though, my friends!!!
There are a few times he sang it on the air...& we is LUCKY 'nough to have a couple right here!!!
"They Didn't Believe Me" is a hidden treasure & def i nate ly PURE & TRUE Dino-magic!
SO SO much fun watchin' Dean do his thin' to this cool cool number!
NO WAY I was just gonna play one vid!
Now THAT is what Summer is ALL 'bout!
Over-indulgin' in Dino!
Hahaha!!!
It's a Completely Cool Cool Concoction, pals!
Youse just gotta grab some Fun Fun Friends or Fam...Get outside, in this Beautiful weather...& throw on some Smooth Smooth Swingin' jams by Dino!
Nice...simple equation, pals.
Virus or no virus...we'll keep the party goin!
Enjoy!